Action No-brainer:
There is apparently an entity called a Jammwalion to whom this film is dedicated. Vidyut Jammwal doesn’t believe in wasting time. Right off he does dangerous stunts atop a local train, and his admiring tapori fans call him “crakk,” pardon the spelling. That gives the film its title, Crakk: Jeetega Toh Jiyegaa.
There is no wall Siddhu (Jamwwal) won’t parkour over, no height from which he won’t jump, with no evidence of broken bones or even a bruise. In spite of the death of his brother Nihal (Ankit Mohan) in an underground extreme sports tournament called Maidaan, Siddu wants to participate in it too, for the huge prize money. So, he is taken to Poland in a container—no passport or visa required—and transported to a castle, with a bunch of contestants from various countries. Considering how he got there, Siddu is never short of wardrobe changes or product for his long hair that stays put no matter what he rolls under or flies over.
The showrunner of the tournament is Dev (Arjun Rampal), who poses the final, killer challenge to whoever survives the earlier three rounds, because this a win-or-die contest. But what to do between races? Siddhu befriends the Indian bookie of Maidaan (Jamie Lever, who gets two semi-funny lines) and leers at influencer Alia (Nora Fatehi), flirting in his Mumbai lingo and of course, she falls for him in an instant. The film directed and co-written (with three others, if writing this is!) by Aditya Datt, needs more padding, so there’s a plot about plutonium smuggling and the Interpol, represented by Patricia (Amy Jackson) and some random white guys.
The races are mostly tests of speed and full of gladiatorial cruelty—like being chased by hungry dogs—watched by hundreds of cheering fans dressed in cosplay outfits. It couldn’t be too deep underground if Maidaan is seen by people all over the world—including the Mumbai taporis—on their phones. The Polish authorities are of course blissfully ignorant of the mayhem wrought on their streets and in the skies (motorbikes tossed off planes!) by these danger junkie lunatics.
For an action movie, Crakk does not have enough pulse-pounding sequences, and the ones there are, remain at a cartoonish level. Jammwal’s physical prowess is awe-inspiring, but he sorely lacks in the acting department, so weeping over murdered brother or pacifying worried parents kind of scenes are beyond him; and romancing a guy who drags the girl around chained to him (even though she is a willing volunteer) would soon scare, tire or bore her. He has also produced this film, so he only has himself to blame for how dull it is. Arjun Rampal pretends like he were in Mad Max or something, which is probably the only way to get through Crakk… that or a fat pay packet.
(This piece first appeared in scroll.in)
